¡Hola! This is my website, but you can look through it. I am Puddlesky, and I am a freshman at Stevens Institute of Technology. You might ask yourself, "why would Puddlesky make a website dedicated to himself?". Well, I'm not going to answer that for you, I just said you might ask yourself that. Anyway, in this site, you can find out what makes Puddlesky tick (besides "sexy dames and plenty of 'em"). Let's see who's viewing my page today....I see Jim, Scott, Beth, George, and %n. But not Larry. Oh well, maybe next time. So stick around, and you'll get your cheez-its shortly.

Last Updated: November 16, 2000

Well, it's been over a year since i updated this. haha oh well. Dave motivated me to update this when he asked for my website URL!!! hahah yes! ok well whats new.... i'm at stevens now... and i still aim every day, but i miss all you guys.

There's a link to AOL Instant Messenger at the bottom of the page. My screen name is also provided, if you'd like to contact me.

Check out my very own Simpsons page.

i really don't know what i'm gonna do with this page. Email me if you have any ideas. maybe i'll just change a few words here and there every year or so.

Sportscenter quote of the week: "DONNIE DOESN'T GET CABLE ANYMORE!"

And here's your moment of Zen: "show me that smile again, don't waste another minute on your cryin'"

I would like to add that this page is also dedicated to the memories of Chris Farley (1964-1997) and Phil Hartman (1948-1998). These two talented men were, in my belief, the two funniest actors I've ever seen on television or in the movies. Several of these sounds are provided by SNL InfoMedia.

Below are a handful of sounds taken from their tenure on "Saturday Night Live," and their movies.

Chris Farley as 'Matt Foley: Motivational Speaker':
"Now as your father probably told ya, my name is Matt Foley, and I am a motivational speaker."
"Now let's get started by letting me give you a little scenario of what my life is all about."
"First off, I am 35 years old, I am divorced, and I live in van down by the river."
"Well, whoop dee FRIKIN' doo!"
"Now you kids are probably sayin' to yourselfs 'hey, I'm gonna go out and get the WORLD by the tail, and wrap it around, and pull it down and put it in my pocket!' Well I'm here to tell ya that you're probably gonna find out as you go out there, that you're not going to amount to JACK SQUAT!"
"Well, La dee FRIKIN' da!"
"Dad, I wish you could just shut your big YAPPER!"
"You're gonna end up eating a steady diet of government cheese, and livin' in a van down by the river!"
"Now you kids are probably asking yourselves, 'Hey, Matt! How can we get back on the right track?'"
"Young man, what do you want to do with your life!?"
"From what I've heard, you're using your paper not for writing, but for rollin' doobies!
"You're gonna be doin' a lotta doobie-rollin', when you're livin' in a van down by the river!"

Chris Farley as 'El Nino':
"I am el nino! All other tropical storms must bow before el nino! Yo soy el nino! For those of you who don't habla espanol, el nino is spanish for...the nino!"

Chris Farley as 'Bennet Brauer':
"Well, maybe I'm not 'the norm.' I'm not 'camera friendly.' I don't 'wear clothes that fit me.' I'm not a 'heartbreaker.' I haven't had 'sex with a woman.' I don't know 'how that works.' I guess I don't 'fall in line.'"
"I'm not 'hygenic.' I don't 'wipe property.' I lack 'style.' I have no 'charisma' or 'self-esteem.' I don't 'own a toothbrush' or 'let my scabs heal.' I can't 'reach all the parts of my body.' When I sleep, I 'sweat perfusely.'

Chris Farley as 'Tommy Callahan' in 'Tommy Boy':
"Fat guy in a little coat! Fat guy in a little coat!"
"Hey I'll tell you what, you could get a good look at a butcher's ass by stickin' your head up there, but wouldn't you rather take his word for it?"
"Son of a -- that's gonna leave a mark!"
"Holy shnikies!"

Phil Hartman as Frank Sinatra:
"What gives, Cueball? I'm lookin' at you, I'm thinkin' 14 IN THE SIDE POCKET!"
"You don't scare me. I got chunks of guys like you in my stool!"
"Issue number four...Milli Vanilli: what is this faggot crap?"

Phil Hartman as Peter Graves:
"So, gold is long and thing like, say...Kareem Abdul Jabbar."
"The pedistal was too weak to hold the osmium, wasn't it, doctor?" - "Yes." - "Did you design these pedistals, doctor?" - "Yes." - "Alright."
"So, molecules are very, very small." - "Yes." - "But you said they were just, 'very small.'" - "Yes." - "So, you were wrong."

Phil Hartman as Ed McMahon:
"You are correct sir, yes!"

Phil Hartman as Bill Clinton:

"Let me tell ya something...there's gonna be a whole buncha things we don't tell Mrs. Clinton."

Phil Hartman as Doctor McCoy from a Star Trek sketch:
"Doctor McCoy, this man needs medical attention." - "Dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor, not a -- oh...oh, sure."

Phil Hartman as O'Connor, film star:
"You'll never work in this town again! - "Don't leave me hanging by a thread, let me know where I stand!" - "I think you're the worst actor I've ever seen and I get 500 letters a day telling me the same!" - "What's the word on the street?"
"Is it the bills?" - "No!" - "The sheep?" - "No!" - "The ducks?" - "No!" - "Your wife?" - "No, it's -- WHAT!?" - "WHAT?" - "WHAT!?"

As of now, of you people have witnessed the awesome power of Puddlesky
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Screen name: puddlesky